After dating for two years, my husband, Nikhil and I decided to get married rather quickly. Or rather the decision was slow but settling on a date that was convenient to everyone made it soon rather than later. We were also having 2 ceremonies (a Hindu ceremony in Chennai, India followed by a Catholic ceremony in Colombo, Sri Lanka). As I had not anticipated this new and exciting life-change, I couldn‘t help but wish I has been less of a spendthrift and saved up for my “Big day“. Being the quintessential girl at heart, I too wanted a fairytale wedding (but without the accompanying cash-crises common to so many South Asian families).Luckily for us, Nikhil’s family was planning and putting together the Hindu ceremony. We had only the Catholic ceremony and the reception to worry about. As I was going to be out of the country up until barely 2 months before the Catholic ceremony, I got the ball rolling by going wedding saree shopping with my mum. Sophisticated darling that she is, she managed to get me a beautiful ivory colored Kanchipuram silk with gold brocade work. Other than the fact that I simply loved the saree, I was thrilled that I had to visit only one other shop before I found it at Rasi Silks (Wellawatte) and it cost us only Rs. 15,000/- !!!!
Next, we got my Maid’s sarees - crepes in a Flesh Pink tone - at a small shop in Pettah for Rs. 700/- each (with blouse piece). I teemed it with blouse pieces in Onion Peel Silk Cotton from Fashion Fabrics (Colpetty) to give it some pizzazz. The Maid’s jewellery (set of necklace, earrings and bangle for approx. Rs. 350/- each) was from Shrina Palace (Wattala) and matched my mum’s traditional family jewellery (crafted by the family jeweller in Jaffna back in the good old days) which I had asked to borrow for the ceremony.
Invites were also from a delightful little shop (again in Pettah). Done on textured cards with an embossed motif, they cost next to nothing and reflected simple and understated beauty. My mother’s friend helped by making a simple wedding cake (with little daisies, just like I wanted it) and individual wedding cakes to serve the guests, all at cost. The cake was packed in traditional-looking Indian drawstring pouches.
After hunting around for venues that would not be difficult to get to given the security situation in Colombo, I was ready to call off the idea of a reception. All the usual venues were 5-star hotels around Colombo’s Galle Face area - which is a hive of security check-points and road blocks. While getting to them after the service would probably be a nightmare on a Saturday evening, I was hesitant to pay a small fortune for Ballrooms and décor and what not. We almost settled for a Lawn but changed our minds when we were told the hotel would not make any provision for a marquee if it rained!!Nikhil, who’d lived his entire life out of Sri Lanka (save for a short working stint during which we met) had been to a couple of weddings while in Sri Lanka. While we had a great time at the weddings, we knew for certain that we would not have a live band nor baila music at our own. Though having lived in Sri Lanka, I hadn’t really imagined breaking with tradition where venue was concerned. Of course, I hadn‘t counted on my husband‘s wonderful lack of compulsion to follow in anyone‘s footsteps.
That’s how we ended up with a wonderful little beachside party at The Golden Mile (Mt. Lavinia). The sumptuous buffet of fresh sea-food and vegetarian dishes, together with champagne and drinks cost us only as much as it would have for food alone if we’d gone with any of the usual hotels. Needless to say the wood-cabin style restaurant’s décor of lantern-candles and fairy lights coupled with the stretch of Mt. Lavinia beach and a full moon (which opportunely was the largest in the year) gave us an ambiance I doubt I’d have been able to achieve with any expensive wedding-décor. I am also positive that it was the combined positive thoughts of the Golden Mile Team that allowed the clouds to part and ensured we had a sunny and beautiful day ending in a beautiful evening under a clear sky in the peak of a south-western monsoon.
The only bump I encountered was in the department of “Bridal-Dressing”. The business of Wedding planning and Bridal Dressing is a lucrative one. But I had not counted on how stressful the whole experience could be to a Bride-to-be.I opted for Ms. Janaki Kurukulasuriya at Salon Bliss (Wellawatte) because my cousin‘s wife had used her a few months before and as Bridesmaid, I found her seamstress to be excellent (she actually got a perfect fit from just one fit on!). However, all my well-articulated notes complete with pictures were no help as the lady refused to discuss anything until I was back in the country (barely 2months before the wedding!). So on her advice, my sister (who was incidentally my Maid of Honour) had paid a non-refundable deposit of Rs. 12,000/-.
I was optimistic on my first consultation, as I was fairly clear on my dream wedding. Unfortunately, for me, Ms. Kurukulasuriya, thought my saree was hideous! The only way I could escape being told I needed to get another saree (which incidentally was what my cousin’s wife had been told) was to say that the Groom’s parents had gifted the saree to me and I dared not change it. It was all downhill from there. The jewellery was dismissed with a disdainful shrug, my ideas for my own and the Maids’ saree blouses were criticized as “old-fashioned” and my request for a simple sheath of lilies condemned as “funeral flowers”.
Of course in her favour, she did suggest a bridal bouquet of roses at Rs. 10,000/-, (though personally I thought it was a crime to spend so much on flowers for a few hours) or the option of checking elsewhere if I so wished, as her suppliers wouldn‘t work within my budget. I say “helpfully“ because it was indeed a great suggestion which led me to find beautiful bouquets and hair pieces for myself and three maids (with boutonnières for Nikhil’s and my Dad), church and car décor in a pretty Daisies & Tulle theme - all for just Rs. 18,250/- from Flowers of Summer (Colpetty). It was excellent! And best of all, the proprietress of Flowers of Summer (Ms. Janaki de Soysa) was warm and helpful and made me really feel like I was going to be a Bride!! It was all discussed and arranged in just 2 visits and I didn’t have to worry about a thing once it was in the capable hands of the Flowers of Summer team.
But back to my dressing nightmare, I was slightly jaded but stubbornly set on having my dream-wedding and therefore was (hopefully understandably) disappointed when I saw that my idea for boat-necked saree blouses was changed to scooped-necks at our first fit on. This was compounded by the fact that the dressing-room was a walled-off little space between the salon and the adjoining building, complete with ally-dirt, a barely covered drain and a makeshift roof. I was told that if I wanted to be dressed in a hotel room (which I did) I would have to pay the lady Rs. 10,000/- for her trouble (and this was in addition to her travel costs).I could feel myself turning into the proverbial Bridezilla as I almost burst into tears. This was not what I wanted!! Correct me if I’m wrong, but wasn’t I the Bride-to be??? Didn’t want I want matter???? But I was in for a rude shock as I was told off very bitingly by the lady that I had an “attitude” and that she regretted having taken my booking!!!! So much for customer service and giving a Bride her fairytale wedding!
To cut a long story short, after a series of ugly phone calls in which Ms. Kurukulasuriya had apparently told the seamstress that she would not get any more orders if she gave us our outfits directly, and I was told I would not get my tailored outfits unless I paid a further Rs. 14,000/- I decided to cut loose and go with someone who would help me make my dream wedding come true. Though I was very relieved to be done with the good lady, I was unhappily relieved of Rs. 26,000/- for my trouble gained Ms. Kurukulasuriya’s expert condemnation that mine was the ugliest saree she’d seen in all her 30odd years in the business and the curse that I’d probably have the ugliest wedding ever!!
But in retrospect, I think I should atleast send her a thank you note because she (yet again!) did me a huge favour because I ended up going to The Cutting Station (Jawatte) where my stylist Leena did an excellent job of making us all look like glam-girls. Again I must mention the entire experience of pre-wedding trial and wedding-day dressing up left me feeling pampered and special. I got a free haircut and was dressed at the hotel as I’d planned for no extra cost! Brilliant!!
So fast forward to the long-awaited day, surrounded by my sis and mum (my pillars of strength and good sense), my angelic little nephew who graciously acted as Ringbearer, best girlfriends, dear friends and relatives, and my handsome (and oh so patient and loving) husband Nikhil, his loving family and best buddies, I felt radiant and beautiful and happy to become a wife (which is hopefully how all Brides feel irrespective of how much their bridal bouquets cost) Young and talented photographer Dhanush de Costa was at hand to capture it all.
Everyone had a great time and I certainly had a Fairytale wedding in every sense of the word.
